April 25, 2009
To my darling wife,
I won't say I knew that I would be unemployed for this long when I first came here, but I knew life would be different, and I knew it would be tough. I've had to adjust to a whole new way of living, and a whole new culture. I expected that. We haven't had a lot of money to live off of, but I'm fine with that. Things are shitty sometimes and then sometimes they're fucking fantastic. We were big timing for a while, and now we're not. In a few more months, we might be big timing again. Who knows. What does it really matter though? To me, life is about more than just how much money I do or don't have. It's about who I spend it with, how I live it, and experiencing as much as possible.
I don't regret anything. My life has been one big adventure since moving here, and even if it's not well padded with funds, it's still a lot of fun, overall. Plus, I'm with you. If I don't mind the idea of living in the Philippines, what makes you think I mind the occasional troubles we have here? Sure, it sucks sometimes on a day to day basis, but overall it's great.
How could you be a disappointment? You bust your ass at work to make sure you keep your job and we have funds to live on. You come home and make me a meal more often than not. Hell you even do the dishes usually. I couldn't ask for more from you. In fact, I'm often disappointed that you have to do so much, like pulling so many long hours in the office.
I might have been more financially stable in the US, and that's a big might considering the lay-offs going on there, but I wouldn't be as happy with my life. Not by a long shot. Marrying you was the best thing I could've done for myself. No matter how tough things are, the idea of taking care of you keeps me motivated to keep looking for work, to study, and to keep writing.
Things will get better. Things have already started to get better, in fact. Sure, Thumper bumped her damn head and cost us a stack of bills, but shit happens. That's the responsibility of taking on a cat. If Sushi had hurt herself I would've taken her in to the vet too. I can't really be mad about that. I'm just happy Thumper is going to be ok. I want her to grow up and kick Dapper's butt one day. That would be fun to watch!
So, in short, you've given me more than I feel I deserve sometimes. I'm the lucky one here. I couldn't ask to have a better wife by my side, and this small sacrifice is nothing compared to the benefits I receive from having you. I wouldn't have it any other way, except for me finding a job and us being big timing again. That would be a blast. Oh... and I like your butt.
Your loving husband