I dont know anyone who has never experienced betrayal. I have witnessed and experienced it many times over. It is normal to brood over it but after awhile it is always best to just drop it and move on. Accept that people cannot behave the way you want them to. If you can be kind, considerate and honest, dont be a fool to demand, expect and assume your friend will likewise be the same. Otherwise, expect to be disappointed.
I have a friend who lied to me before. Big deal, I let it slide. The lie didnt affect my life.
Later on, he pulled a stunt that led to a chaotic ordeal for me. My good friend chose to withhold a vital information that was important and would affect my life. Instead of simply just letting me know the truth so I can help find a solution to a potential impending problem, he just fled and let me deal with the loose ends. He didnt lie this time, but he also deprived me of the truth.
Again I let him off the hook so easily. I moved on, I didnt brood and figured that he may have a reason for the way he acted.
We got in touch again like nothing happened. Picked up where we left off.
Then my good friend lied again, like I wouldnt know. This time it somehow affected my life, but not to that degree that can make me hate him.. Perhaps there is a reason why he lied, so I gave him all the chance in the world to just be truthful. Unfortunately the resolve to stick to the lie was stronger.
My friend did not steal from me nor spread some nasty rumor about me. He just lied.
He is not evil I am sure of that. But it is a sad fact that I cannot trust him anymore.
Sometimes we tend to lie especially if we know that taking that course would be more beneficial to the recipient. I lied to my dad once when he asked me if he will be okay soon. I wanted to give him hope because I love him. His smile and positive spirit meant more to me that day than a flimsy lie that could potentially still make me go to hell since it is still a LIE.
So when is it justifiable to not tell the truth then?
I love my friends. I am capable to go through such crazy lengths to sometimes prove or express my love and loyalty. But once Im crossed, its hard to earn my trust back.
I think of the years of friendship and I try earnestly to find the reasons to hold on, I dont want the investment to go to waste. But the truth keeps rearing its ugly head.
There are things worth saving like good friendships. But if a person cannot be trusted is it wise to still continue that relationship?
Is it time to delineate friends from acquaintance? Not an enemy but not a friend. It is a subtle way of forgiving and minimizing the hate.At least in this case we arent strangers. Just acquaintances.
My reaction is not unique, it is simply human nature.
I just want to travel light. brood, drop and move on.