Jan 11, 2012

Daily thoughts - A proud me a year after

I dont have a lot of regrets in life. I believe that I am where I am because of the past mistakes, even heartbreaks and stupidity. But there is one thing I do regret and am ashamed of. When I remember that first smoke and the many more that followed later on escalating into a chronic and nasty habit. It was 14 years ago and I dont remember actually enjoying it. I do remember swearing it off and being so vocal about how bad it tasted. I have a vivid memory of my head swimming when I took a drag of my first cigarette. I had to sit down because it made me dizzy.  Strangely it took me more than a decade to muster the willpower to finally say NO to smoking.

I admit it was a daunting goal. I have attempted many times. I could go for weeks, months and even a year without a cigarette and even thought I was already "safe",that i would never want another smoke again. Sadly I discovered I was wrong. There is no such thing as a "holiday" when you say youre done with a habit or in this case addiction. There is should be no "break" to that road to recovery. You just have to remember that ONE puff is one too many to a recovering smoker as it is to an alcoholic who wants just one swig of beer.

The longest time I went without a smoke was a year and a half. Dont ask me why I fell off the wagon.  The important thing now is I know what I want and Im hell bent on making sure Im going to steer clear of engaging in such a filthy vice again.

Just the same, I dont condemn people who are still hooked on smoking. It is not easy to quit as some claim it to be. If it was easy, then how can these self righteous bastards explain why a lot of people are still smoking after more than 50 years of their life.


Let the one without sin cast the first stone.
Dont be an ass just because you were able to quit. I know of a "friend" who has stopped smoking for what, 4 months? and here he goes proselytizing and worse making harsh judgments on facebook sounding all ferocious against smokers. IMO thats not the way to go. Just because you almost died from smoking, that makes you the prophet on why someone should nick the habit. It is a personal decision and not a simple status update on facebook meant to impress friends.

In my case it took me years of gradual, conscious planning. I tried every trick that I found practical. I read books and researched online. Also, I know of someone very close to me who passed away as a result of chronic smoking that led to a battery of illnesses. In short it was not easy. But taking that first step was the most crucial. You wont get to your destination if you never start somewhere.

Mine was a year ago. Im happy, proud and if I can do it so can you.

2 comments:

  1. wow good job! i'm on my 4th(?) month of being smoke free *fingers-crossed*

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  2. You can do it! =) just reward yourself every month to keep you motivated. be it a new gadget, a fancy dinner, or any stuff you fancy. although the real deal here is, you reward yourself already by being healthy=) its worth it. Good Luck!!

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